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Please play nicely.  No one wants to listen/read a keyboard warriors rants....

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Author Topic: females  (Read 3765 times)

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r1

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females
« on: 07 September 2011, 19:47:25 »
now my mrs has been putting on a few pounds so she is now going to zumba,kickersize and body combat to try and get rid.now she pays a few quid to do all this so i said to her why dont you  save some money by cutting the grass tonight putting out the bins and painting the spare room.but no these are all my jobs.then when she comes in she rewards her self with a bar of cadburys or pigs out on pretzels.last night i happened to mention this and the ear ache i got off her was un real.but the worst thing is she keeps asking me if i think shes slimmer and the honest reply is no[in fact i  think shes gaining] but as i like living i tend to fudge the question when i really want to say stop eating all those cakes and fruit and nut then you wont look like a porker.
do you think i should man up and speak the truth or maybe tex her?
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Gaffers

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Re: females
« Reply #1 on: 07 September 2011, 19:52:22 »
Photos never lie, especially over time.  That way you don't have to tell her..... :y
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LJay

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Re: females
« Reply #2 on: 07 September 2011, 20:01:10 »
There is a phrase that my father in law is convinced that every husband should learn and use, it is...

Yes, my love.

My advice would be not to lie to her or she'll probably cut your balls off for you. :y

Oh and to remember that muscle is heavier than fat! ;)
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Been there, fallen over it!

cem_devecioglu

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Re: females
« Reply #3 on: 07 September 2011, 20:04:04 »
Quote
There is a phrase that my father in law is convinced that every husband should learn and use, it is...

Yes, my love.

My advice would be not to lie to her or she'll probably cut your balls off for you. :y

Oh and to remember that muscle is heavier than fat! ;)


clever man, political answer ;D :y
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Sir Tigger KC

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Re: females
« Reply #4 on: 07 September 2011, 20:07:25 »
Man up and tell Mrs r1 the terrible truth :o :o :o

Then post photos of the aftermath....  ;D ;D ;D
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Re: females
« Reply #5 on: 07 September 2011, 20:09:54 »
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There is a phrase that my father in law is convinced that every husband should learn and use, it is...

Yes, my love.

My advice would be not to lie to her or she'll probably cut your balls off for you. :y

Oh and to remember that muscle is heavier than fat! ;)



I hope that Mr Jimbob never tells you a porky Mrs Jimbob.... :D :D ;)
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Lioned

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Re: females
« Reply #6 on: 07 September 2011, 20:27:58 »
I no longer make any attempt whatsoever to understand my wife.

I have been faking deafness for the past couple of years,i have found that to work quite well.
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TheBoy

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Re: females
« Reply #7 on: 07 September 2011, 20:35:05 »
As my dad used to say...

Women, can't live them, can't shoot them
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Grumpy old man

r1

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Re: females
« Reply #8 on: 07 September 2011, 20:38:07 »

I have been faking deafness for the past couple of years,i have found that to work quite well.[/quote]

ive been trying this approach for a while now and she says ive got to go to the doc but avoided it so far but her mates told her about some candals that draw the wax out so shes getting some for me at the weekend!
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TheBoy

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Re: females
« Reply #9 on: 07 September 2011, 20:41:21 »
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I have been faking deafness for the past couple of years,i have found that to work quite well.
I can genuinely claim deafness  :-[
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I_want_an_Omega

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Re: females
« Reply #10 on: 07 September 2011, 20:41:23 »
Ear candles are only supposed to be used by trained peeps. Imagine getting molten wax down your ear  :-X
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LJay

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Re: females
« Reply #11 on: 07 September 2011, 20:50:26 »
Quote
Quote
I have been faking deafness for the past couple of years,i have found that to work quite well.
I can genuinely claim deafness  :-[

Then you must have the information beaten into you syllable by syllable!
Lets see how long it takes for full hearing to return! :y
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LJay

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Re: females
« Reply #12 on: 07 September 2011, 20:52:00 »
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Quote
There is a phrase that my father in law is convinced that every husband should learn and use, it is...

Yes, my love.

My advice would be not to lie to her or she'll probably cut your balls off for you. :y

Oh and to remember that muscle is heavier than fat! ;)



I hope that Mr Jimbob never tells you a porky Mrs Jimbob.... :D :D ;)

Hmmm, he seems to work on the theory that forgiveness is easier than permission.....it's a man thing apparently! >:( ;D
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TheBoy

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Re: females
« Reply #13 on: 07 September 2011, 20:53:48 »
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Ear candles are only supposed to be used by trained peeps. Imagine getting molten wax down your ear  :-X
They sound like they are for poofs as well ;)
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LJay

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Re: females
« Reply #14 on: 07 September 2011, 20:59:16 »
Quote
Quote
Ear candles are only supposed to be used by trained peeps. Imagine getting molten wax down your ear  :-X
They sound like they are for poofs as well ;)

You should get some then TB seeing as you're too much of a poof to go and get your ears syringed! :y :P
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Been there, fallen over it!
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