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[r1]

now my mrs has been putting on a few pounds so she is now going to zumba,kickersize and body combat to try and get rid.now she pays a few quid to do all this so i said to her why dont you  save some money by cutting the grass tonight putting out the bins and painting the spare room.but no these are all my jobs.then when she comes in she rewards her self with a bar of cadburys or pigs out on pretzels.last night i happened to mention this and the ear ache i got off her was un real.but the worst thing is she keeps asking me if i think shes slimmer and the honest reply is no[in fact i  think shes gaining] but as i like living i tend to fudge the question when i really want to say stop eating all those cakes and fruit and nut then you wont look like a porker.
do you think i should man up and speak the truth or maybe tex her?

[Gaffers]

Photos never lie, especially over time.  That way you don't have to tell her.....

[LJay]

There is a phrase that my father in law is convinced that every husband should learn and use, it is...

Yes, my love.

My advice would be not to lie to her or she'll probably cut your balls off for you.

Oh and to remember that muscle is heavier than fat!

[cem_devecioglu]

There is a phrase that my father in law is convinced that every husband should learn and use, it is...

Yes, my love.

My advice would be not to lie to her or she'll probably cut your balls off for you.

Oh and to remember that muscle is heavier than fat!

clever man, political answer

[Sir Tigger KC]

Man up and tell Mrs r1 the terrible truth

Then post photos of the aftermath.... 

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

There is a phrase that my father in law is convinced that every husband should learn and use, it is...

Yes, my love.

My advice would be not to lie to her or she'll probably cut your balls off for you.

Oh and to remember that muscle is heavier than fat!

I hope that Mr Jimbob never tells you a porky Mrs Jimbob....

[Lioned]

I no longer make any attempt whatsoever to understand my wife.

I have been faking deafness for the past couple of years,i have found that to work quite well.

[TheBoy]

As my dad used to say...

Women, can't live them, can't shoot them

[r1]

I have been faking deafness for the past couple of years,i have found that to work quite well.[/quote]

ive been trying this approach for a while now and she says ive got to go to the doc but avoided it so far but her mates told her about some candals that draw the wax out so shes getting some for me at the weekend!

[TheBoy]

I have been faking deafness for the past couple of years,i have found that to work quite well.

I can genuinely claim deafness 

[I_want_an_Omega]

Ear candles are only supposed to be used by trained peeps. Imagine getting molten wax down your ear 

[LJay]

I have been faking deafness for the past couple of years,i have found that to work quite well.

I can genuinely claim deafness 

Then you must have the information beaten into you syllable by syllable!
Lets see how long it takes for full hearing to return!

[LJay]

There is a phrase that my father in law is convinced that every husband should learn and use, it is...

Yes, my love.

My advice would be not to lie to her or she'll probably cut your balls off for you.

Oh and to remember that muscle is heavier than fat!

I hope that Mr Jimbob never tells you a porky Mrs Jimbob....

Hmmm, he seems to work on the theory that forgiveness is easier than permission.....it's a man thing apparently!

[TheBoy]

Ear candles are only supposed to be used by trained peeps. Imagine getting molten wax down your ear 

They sound like they are for poofs as well

[LJay]

Ear candles are only supposed to be used by trained peeps. Imagine getting molten wax down your ear 

They sound like they are for poofs as well

You should get some then TB seeing as you're too much of a poof to go and get your ears syringed!