Not today but yesterday.
Bear with me because its a bit difficult to explain.
We have a small Cherry tree in the garden, and hanging from it is a bird feeder type of thing.
Its made from plastic coated wire about 3mm diameter, is apple shaped and about 6 inches across.
It has a spike about 2 inches long, which I think swmbo sticks an apple on for the birds to eat.
I bent over near this tree about 11am yesterday and somehow managed to impale myself through my eyelid on the spike.
I dont mind admitting a panicked like f*** and was convinced I had just had my eye out.
Swmbo heard me yell, took one look and almost passed out.
When she gathered herself she called 999 and luckily an Ambulance wasnt far way and arrived in about 10 minutes.
They werent interested in pulling it out, but bandaged the whole thing to my head and carted me off to A&E on blues & twos.
They took some pics, because apparently it was one of the more unusual callouts they have ever had.
When I got to hospital I was like a freak show. People, including the staff were gathering around to take pics.

Anyway, after about three and a half hours of having this thing strapped to my head, it was examined very carefully at the eye dept.and they declared a near miracle.
It was pressing on my eyeball but hadnt damaged it. It slid across the eye and came back out through my upper eyelid.
They then pulled it out and spent a very long time cleaning everything up
Gave me ointment and antibiotics and sent me back to A&E for a Tetanus jab and a precautionary CT scan.
After a further 3 hours or so of waiting I discovered the bloke opposite had suffered a stroke and had been waiting 12 hours to be dealt with.
He was even hobbling to the toilet by himself !
I asked about the wait and was told due to a lack of Porters the scan would probably happen around 4am.
At that point I told them to give me the Tetanus jab and discharged myself.
A bit sore and light sensitive this morning but otherwise ok and feeling like I should have bought a lottery ticked this week.

P.S. Pics are available.
